She spent a long time rebuilding herself because an emotionally abusive person knocked her down and made her feel less than. She’s got a heart of gold but she still has insecurities and bad days where she feels awful about herself. Her heart was broken to pieces when he took advantage of her good heart.
He fucked with her emotions. He acted as if he was the sweetest most loving person when really, he was a fake and a phony. He said all of the right things and fed off of her insecurities like a pro. What satisfaction does that give him? Did he enjoy every last minute until the time he decided he was done with her?
She did confide in him about many things and she thought he confided in her as well but that couldn’t be further from the truth. Why did he have sex with her and stop talking to her not even 24 hours after? She just needs to know what happened, She wants closure. If he had a change of heart or feelings changed, she still deserves to know for her own peace of mind.
She gave her heart to him because he made her believe he was real. He made indirect comments about being her boyfriend. She thought you guys had a blast together the times you went out. So, what was it? Was she too good to be true? Well, she is real and most definitely too good for him.
Suddenly walking away like he did fucked with her self-esteem and self worth. She told him time and time again that she was nervous and self-conscious about her herself and all he said was “you’re beautiful and amazing,” That was a lie. Was anything he said remotely close to the truth? Or was the whole thing about getting laid?
Anyone who does that is a disgusting and disgraceful excuse for a human being. He has no problems sleeping at night knowing he’s intentionally hurting people’s feelings.
She is lying awake playing everything back in her mind to see where or what could have gone wrong. She comes up with nothing. She cries and cries and is beating herself up because she feels used and manipulated. She is physically sick to her stomach because she can’t fathom how a person could take such a precious girl and damage what she worked so hard to piece back together.
She thinks that everything he ever told her was a blatant lie. He played an expert role when it came to being the insecure, lost little boy. It’s almost as if it was an unconscious thing to do. The thing is, she wouldn’t have ran away had he been honest about things. Because she would have had his back when everyone else turned theirs on him.
He can’t just blow it with the one girl who would always put him first and herself second. Or at least give an explanation as to why he got up and left without a word. Her feelings matter and she deserves an explanation. She doesn’t deserve to be beating herself up because he’s a shitty person.
She is awesome and amazing and losing her will be his biggest regret. She’s so much more than what he sees but that’s ok. She made a promise to herself that no one would ever dull her sparkle again.